Leatherman

ARGH!
I'm SO angry right now. this is why..

i was at the service station today before work and, lucky for me, i decided to check my wallet BEFORE putting fuel in, for once, and it soon became apparent to me that it was not there. i had left it somewhere. assuming it was where i had stayed that night, i called up The Boy and asked him to have a look, not there. damn. together we figured out it must have been at K-Rads, because thats where i was the night before, when i last remember using it. anyway she's at work HOURS before me, and nobody would have been at her house, so i had to borrow money off The Boy, because he lives closest to the service station. *thank u again by the way, if you read this* anyway thats all well and good, it's my own stupid fault for being a forgetfull idiot, lol.

as i was doing all this, some ASSHOLE pulled up behind me, and started abusing me because i was in his way, and he was apparently born without even the pretence of good manners, patience and, in my personal opinion... must be from some sort of trailer-trash-esque background, because after yelling from the car for a good... thirsty seconds.. he drives forward, pretending as if to ram into the back of my car, to which of course, i dont take well at all, and proceed to run off a course of the rather largely offensive vocabulary i have aquired over my 22 1/2 years of army brat-turned-punk-rocker-kid *which i've obviously grown out of again* at him, which, to my suprise *and annoyance* was countered with the unimaginative 'cunt', 'idiot' and 'asshole'. i felt a bit cheated, because here was someone i could really lay into, verbally, and never have to deal with again(!), but no, he was the Leatherman, who couldnt thing of anything else.
this may have something to do with why he proceeded to spit on my car window as he drove past, when i finally got fed up and drove off again, because i had to go see The Boy and pick up the money he so sweetly leant me.

thank you goes to The Boy, for saving me YET again.
thank you aswell to the Leatherman... you look like a piece of leather that has not only been picked up and chewed by another piece of leather, but spat out and stomped on... and i wish i had the chance to see it when karma kicks you back in the face. you've successfully ruined my mood, made me half an hour late for work, and acted like a 5 year old throwing a tanty.

thats my life for you, all week i've been sick, and had an ear ache, and now... i get this.

thanks world. love you too.

>:-(

xoxo Willow

What the hell's wrong with you?

She's this massive, horned green monster, and she travels at the speed
of light, hunting me down. I ignore her, or try to, and for a little
while, my eyes are the only way you can tell she is even there. But
watch out, once she finally catches me... and trust me, im incapable of
fending her off for long... she consumes me and that's when it happens.
I become her. I see everything she sees, I feel everything she feels, I
say everything she wants me to say and then...

Then you hate me just a little bit, because you think I've gone mad, and
to be fair, I have a little. but really, all it would have taken to
chase my jealousy demon away was a few little words...

She's nothing.

I know I shouldn't need to hear it, especially in this situation, but my
jealousy demon has never been stronger, because she in league with other
demons such as the confusion beast, the frustration monster and even
sometimes the worst of all... the all consuming, all powerfull, king and
queen of the horrids... mistrust and insecurity, who trump all others
when it comes to weedling into your brain and building cities like
settlers.

The other day they staged an all out war on me, and I lost.
And I lost my dear friend, composure bird.
She flew away in fright and left me with them. shes back now, dragged
back by the determination knights.
She's still jittery and frightened, but im feeding lies and small truths
to calm her.
To keep her.

Maybe the question shouldn't be what the hells wrong with you, but when
the hells wrong with me?

xoxo Willow

Oh Brother of mine...

I had a dream tonight, little brother.
A flash in the darkness.
Just a flash.
Like the last time, I felt it in my bones.
Your face was all I saw.
No more than a second.
But the expression will stay forever.
You couldn't help... someone.
You were being held down.
Held back.
Unable to protect someone you care about.

It felt like watching your heart shatter.

It felt like watching you being made to watch someone slowly hurt
someone you love.

Little brother, you're not a little guy, you're big, powerful, heavy.
Strong.

what person could hold you back when someone you cared about needed you
that badly?

That's the person im scared of most now.
--
Powered by Telstra hiptop.

welcome to Rankcity,,, aka Perth

today i've come to the realisation that i live in a city full of rank.

rank people, rank clubs, rank streets, rank suburbs, rank towers, rank kitchens, rank houses, rank waters, rank criminals, rank smells, rank in general!

the rank is rampant (!) and it's making me very upset that i'm a part of it, which, as a regular visitor to places of ill-repute such as Black Betties... well... i just feel like i've done my part to aid the end of this fine (LOL) city of ours.
so... as of this very moment, i have promise... nay.. i PLEDGE TO THEE, dear reader, that i shall attempt to keep my rankbettys visits down to minimum... and shall avoid acting like a trashy whore if at all possible (doubtful, as it;s way to much fun)

so in effect.. this is just a little blog about how... well.. im gonna go to betties and be disgusting again... probly tonight.... probly tomorrow too... and then Wednesday night i get free enrty so...

RANK SHALL CONTINUE!!!

xoxo Willow

Boredom = Boredom

I've developed the strangest little habit lately, lol.
let me explain...

I get very bored, VERY easy.
...which leads to the most random things happening..

such as... my webcam basically getting used and abused like a Thai hooker.
I'm a cam-whore by definition.. but get me bored and i get inventive.

...or just crazy, not quite sure yet.

jurys out on that one, dont see it coming back with a good answer ;)
so yeah, i tend t go a bit nuts and end up just taking pictures of... well... myself.
generally it's in my back yard pretending that i'm some artsy little thing..

but to be fair... i'm just a dork with a camera on her laptop so HA!
my facebook page gets a bit of action that way... that and i tend to get tagged in random drunken photos... but that's not the point here...

my life is pretty much one big photoshoot right now...

bright eyes, big hair, pretty dresses, candy smiles, borrowed shoes, black liquid eyeliner with black shadow, mascara till next week, pouts and dimples, raise that eyebrow baby girl, lovers party hard, never enough fishnets, heels never high enough, legs never long enough, gossip girl lifestyles...

cam-whore wishes...

i'm supposed to be cleaning my house today, in preperation of my parents coming home..

but lets face it, i'm most likely going to end up outside in the sunshine taking pretty pictures so i can SHINE!

xoxo Willow

worry me a little bit more, why dont you?

doctor! doctor!
i've been getting these odd headaches, like sharp stabbing pain behind my eyes, and it swaps sides occationally, and comes out of nowhere! never lasts very long, but half the time is leaves me feeling like i'm going to be sick.

wtf man!

maybe have a brain cancer and will drop dead any moment?!

oh well, i cant afford to go to the doctors :(

xoxo Willow

Dreamed you up...

I had the oddest dream this morning, and it was so familiar too!
Either I've had it before... or it was in a movie lol.

Basically, me and three friends were floating around and found an
circular island, where we spent a night in the middle, relaxing,
generally being naughty (did I mention one of my friends was jensen
ackles? :p hehe) and having underwater relations. Anyway, it didn't get
a chance to get good and graphic because suddenly there was a massive
storm, so we got in our boat (which had somehow became a big pirate
ship) and got out of the circle island, but the storm kept trying to
push us back, and we got tossed overboard. We were trying to swim away,
and there was life boats crashing over us and stuff. Then it was
morning, the storm was over and we found ourselves on another
island/sandbar thing, and our boat was close enough to race to. Then,
another ship appeared.... REDCOATS (wtf) and we faught them with cannons
and tried to get away and then...

...I woke up.

K-rad was fumbling around her room getting ready for work and I was back
to reality.
The strange thing about it all, was that I wasn't really afraid of any
of it? Like, it didn't scare me at all to hbe honest.

Very odd...

Pity I didn't get graphic dreams with jensen ackles.... that would have
made my night ;)

xoxo Willow